I’m not sure…

I’m not sure…general life theme as of late. Journal entries begin with I’m not sure, conversations begin with I’m not sure…thoughts begin the same.

So, what if I’m not sure? I still try anyway, sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. And I’m not sure if things will work out until I try. So I guess it’s ok if I’m not sure.

I’m learning to take I’m not sure as a call to center, to go inside, to see if there is a place I am sure. Sometimes there is and sometimes there isn’t. And then if I act on that place, that feeling of sureness…sometimes it doesn’t work out the way I thought it would; so I’m not sure?

But to be sure, the truth comes from within. The truth is the only way to live. The truth will always become the only option. So surity then becomes and internal process distinct from external happenings. Surity becomes the trust in oneself that if your truth is sure, then your reactions can be none other than the same; whether or not I was sure it should have gone another way I can be sure it happened the way it was meant to.

But then again…I’m not sure.